#36 Fear Based Parenting

Today we’re asking the question: Are you parenting through fear? It may surprise you to know that many of the decisions we make as parents come from a place of fear… There’s a healthy way to take this on and some not so healthy ways. Leslie and Leslyn share examples from their own parenting lives and run through a few of the more difficult challenges we face as parents.

SHOW NOTES:

As time goes by, the number of things that parents seem to be worried about seems to be growing exponentially. Is the world really more dangerous or are we simply more aware of life’s dangers? Did Helicopter parenting rise out of our culture or has our culture risen from fearful parents?

Leslie and Leslyn talk about different styles of parenting through fear from Helicopter parenting to Defensive parenting. They explain that many of these dysfunctional parenting tendencies stem from our own childhoods and/or the fear that we individually hold. Ultimately, we are passing our fears from one generation to the next when we stifle childhood experiences because we are afraid.

Dismantling obstacles and eliminating risk are specifically hazardous to the long term welfare of our children. Even though parents think they are helping, in reality they are preventing children from learning extremely important problem solving life skills. The development of resilience is necessary for emotional stability in adulthood. 

Another problematic parenting style is focused on steering a child in a direction motivated by the parent instead of the desires and dreams of the child. Some parents tend to attempt and fulfill personal broken or faded dreams through their children; living vicariously per se. When we push our children in a direction that is inauthentic to them - as individuals - we are setting both generations up for dysfunctional patterns. 

With personal examples, antidotes, and solutions… Leslie and Leslyn help you think about how your own fears are guiding your parenting decisions.