#34 Understanding the Ego

What do you know about your Ego? Everybody has one and yet we’re conditioned not to acknowledge it, to tone it down, or snuff it out. Is that the healthy thing to do? In this episode, Leslie and Leslyn explain the necessary functions of the Ego and how to identify if yours is healthy and if not… what to do.


Most people have negative connotations when it comes to thinking about the ego but it’s an important part of our personality. Leslyn runs through the Freudian elements of the Id, the Ego, and the Superego to help us understand the tenets of personality from an academic perspective. From instinct, to consciousness, and then morality, the ego parts help us socially exist in the world. However, it can go very wrong.

This discussion focuses on the consciousness elements of the ego - that part of ourselves that most of us consider the ‘self’. The ego helps with confidence, self-assurance, and positive self-image. When we feel inferior, it is indicative of an underdeveloped ego. 

They spend a little time talking about narcissism which, is a great example of someone with an overdeveloped ego. People with an over inflated sense of self can appear kind and selfless superficially. Yet, there is frequently a required tit-for-tat that surfaces as the over-inflated ego seeks to maintain its superiority.

Likewise, an underdeveloped ego might be a ‘door-mat’. People who have a weak ego will often not try new things or appear selfless in an unhealthy way.

The ego is your ‘image’ self - not necessarily your most authentic self. It’s the part of yourself that wants to be liked and have power. It lives in fear of not having those things.  An unhealthy ego is built on core beliefs that are steeped in fear. Consequently, it is constantly driving behavior to mitigate the fear.

As usual, they use personal examples to demonstrate the key points of the discussion and offer suggestions on how to develop more healthy ego components.